Paper Smile

[Verse 1]
I said yes again
With salt in my mouth
Carried your needs home
Like groceries in a brown paper bag

Kept my own name small
Kept my phone face-down
Smiled through the dinner
While my hands shook under the table

[Pre-Chorus]
I learned to bend first
Before I could break
I’d rather be useful
Than hear your sighs say my name

[Chorus - dance beat]
Don’t be mad at me
Don’t look so hurt
I make myself smaller
Just to keep your world from falling
Don’t be mad at me
I’d take the blame
If I disappoint you
I go back to hurting me

[Verse 2]
I wore the bruise like proof
That I tried hard enough
Stayed up too late fixing
What wasn’t mine to fix at all

Picked at every scar
Till the skin went thin
Called it being honest
But I knew I was digging in

[Pre-Chorus]
I learned to bend first
Before I could break
I’d rather be useful
Than hear your sighs say my name

[Chorus - Dance Beat]
Don’t be mad at me
Don’t look so hurt
I make myself smaller
Just to keep your world from falling
Don’t be mad at me
I’d take the blame
If I disappoint you
I go back to hurting me

[Bridge]
What if I say no?
What if you stay?
What if the room holds still
And nobody turns away?

I’m tired of bleeding
To keep the peace
I need to be loved
Even when I’m not easy

[Final Chorus, vocals and drums only]
Don’t be mad at me
Don’t look so hurt
I make myself smaller
Just to keep your world from falling
Don’t be mad at me
I’d take the blame
If I disappoint you
I go back to hurting me

Don’t be mad at me
Let me learn
How to stay whole
When I don’t earn every word